SOUTH LAKE TAHOE
WOMEN'S CENTER
1977 - 2007
Celebrating
30 Years of Service in Our Community
IF YOU ARE IN DANGER
DIAL 911
24-HOUR CRISIS LINE
(530) 544-4444
LESBIAN, GAY, TRANSGENDER & QUESTIONING: DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
MYTH: Domestic violence is not a problem in the gay community.
FACT: Battering is a very serious and pervasive problem in the gay community. Unfortunately, gay battering is a problem that is silenced or hidden. Often, abused men are too afraid or embarrassed to tell even their closets friends and family of their victimization.MYTH: Domestic violence happens only to men who are involved in S&M (sado-masochism) relationships or to men who hang out in bars.
FACT: Battering happens in all types of relationships, to all kinds of men. Many different types of men abuse their lovers. It is important to remember that there is a clear distinction between an S&M relationship in which two men mutually consent to sexual situation which involves inflicting pain and an incident of violence in which a batterer physically and/or emotionally abuses another man to maintain control in a relationship.
MYTH: In gay relationships, usually both men are equally violent.
FACT: Despite the fact that police and criminal justice systems often mistakenly define gay battering as “mutual combat” in reality this is usually not the case. In most relationships, one man is considerably more violent than the other. Although it may be possible that gay men tend to defend themselves more readily than heterosexual victims of domestic violence, this act of self-defense should not be confused with the idea that both parties are equally violent.MYTH: The bigger, stronger man is always the abuser.
FACT: Battered men come in all shapes, sizes and strengths. Being physically or emotionally abused does not mean that a man is a “wimp” or any less a “real man.”MYTH: Battering is a problem in poor and minority communities.
FACT: Like heterosexual domestic violence, gay battering is a problem that crosses all racial, religious, age and class lines.MYTH: Only lovers can experience domestic violence.
FACT: The term “domestic violence” is not limited to men who are currently lovers. It can involve ex-roommates, ex-lovers, family members or members of a lover’s family – almost anyone with whom you have had a previous relationship.
MYTH: There is no help available to men that have been abused.
FACT: The Women’s Center services are completely confidential and free of charge.
If you are in an abusive relationship, contact us at 544-5444 (crisis line) or 544-2118 (business line).